Fake People

Why do we try to make friends with people? Majority of the “friendships” we make, don’t work out. There are 3 possible scenarios to end these “relationships”. 1, they’ll just leave you. Cause they were fake douches to begin with. 2, they will be there, but only when they need you. Only to be fake when you need them. Or, 3, the one I experience, they’re there, but not really there. Let me explain. I have a group of friends that is supposed to be my family. They don’t feel like family anymore. Now, I am on the younger side of the spectrum. They are too, but they are older than me. Now they had a sleepover, I was not invited. I would’ve been fine with them saying that it was spontaneous, I can understand that. But they pulled the age card. They immediately pulled out the, “Oh. Well. You couldn’t come, you have a bedtime!” I’m not gonna lie, I wanted to smack said friend. That just showed me that I’m not actually their true friend. I’m only the friend when they really want me to be, going into reason 2. I have been going through a tough time. I have been posting somethings on my snapchat story, BTW add me @lovenote19, that would alarm people who truly cared. It was actually posts with me showing that low-key shade to my friends. It’s cause I am friends with many people on snapchat, but me seeing their story just depresses me. I feel like I don’t have anyone here for me. I pretty much have to fend for myself, in the sense that those things that you don’t want to talk to your mom about, that you would tell your friends, yeah, I don’t have any of those. It really does suck seeing these people who have all these friends. These people who told me that they were my friend. They’re not. It sucks. It hurts. Also known as reason 1. I mean, I’ve never been at a school for more than 3 years. This would be my first time. So I already have some trust issues. But having these people who make me feel like I can’t depend on them, makes it so much worse. I mean, I want someone to tell me if I’m wrong.

Let me tell you how it all fell apart.

We had a group of friends. It was 5 of us. One of us went and had sex with someone, but lied to us about it for weeks. Also, the person they had sex with was in a relationship. The person from our group had told us that they were going to a birthday party for their best friend. Lying to us about it for weeks. We go to dinner every Friday, or we used to, but I’ll get into that later. The person whose party, said friend, was lying about, actually came to the place we used to have dinner at. It was actually their birthday. But the birthday kid lied to us, but I don’t care about them. My “friend” convinced another member of our friend group to take them to the “party”. Only the person who was cheating, let’s name them person A, was getting dropped off, by person B, in the woods, where person A and someone had sex cheating on the other person’s significant other. Now person A and B finally confessed weeks later. Telling us of the lie. Now we don’t trust Person’s A and B. Now Person’s C and D, well, we’re all still friends. Ish. I think we’re friends. But I also don’t. I feel like I should be able to depend on them. But I also don’t. I feel like we’re still family. But, again, I also don’t. They’re good people. Really good people. But I feel like we don’t get along, more along the lines that I feel excluded in the friendship. Because of that, it’s not friendship. I t doesn’t feel like it, at least.

Message back if you feel similar, or have advice.